For me, this will be one of those memorable milestone years; like the year I graduated from high school, from college, started standup, got married, became an Auntie… but not nearly as pleasant.
2019. Did have its beautiful moments. I achieved a career milestone of finally performing in all 50 states. I traveled to South America for the first time. I performed at DragonCon, emceed NECSS for the third time and CSICON for the first. The American Humanist Association honored me with the Humanist Arts Award.
2019. I got to see My Mother hold her youngest great grandbaby. I rescued a sweet and beautiful cat named, Sir who inexplicably thinks I’m the cat’s meow and is doing his furry best to rescue me.
2019. Revealed who really loves me. And with some difficulty, helped me let go of who doesn’t.
But overall, 2019 was a total shit show. It. Wore. Me. Out. Broke. Me. Down. Stripped. Me. Bare. I truly, truly do not know how I am continuing to stand, breathe, smile, or even be. I guess that speaks to the strength of the foundation that love built and that I have the privilege and responsibility of standing (sometimes kneeling, sitting, laying) on.
2020. It may be better. It may be worse. “No spoilers.” And if I see it, I will likely spend a goodly part of it tending to the grievous wounds of the last 18 months. But I will also try as best I can to keep reaching for personal and professional growth, equanimity, stability, life, love, and joy.
I will try.
There are four lights!