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Leighann Lord is a standup comedian, author,
and creator of the People with Parents Podcast.
Her humor books and comedy albums
​are available on Amazon and iTunes.

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I’m a Catastrophizer

10/1/2020

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That’s a thing and it basically means I can go from zero to catastrophe in under 10 seconds. I can find the worst in any situation. I can snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. I’m #TeamHennyPenny. (Hey, Haters: It’s 2020 and the sky really is falling. I warned you.) And yes, this is a terrible way to live for the people who live with people like me. I’m aware of this tendency and I’ve been working on it. But here’s what it looks like in action.​
I went to the dermatologist today because there was mole that I didn’t quite like the look of.

She takes a look and says, “Oh, that’s a blah blah blah.”

I said, “A what?”


“A blah blah blah.”


“That sounds serious.”


“It’s not.” Then she whips out her iPad and starts showing me pictures of blah blah blah’s on Google. I think, “Eww, mine’s way cuter.”


She says, “Its nothing to worry about. I can remove it if you like.”


“Ahh. So when do I schedule the surgery?”


She said, “You don’t. I’ll do it right here in the office.”


“Now?”


“Now.”


“Just like that?”


“Just like that.”


“So, I’m not dying?”


“No.”


“But I already planned the funeral.”


“I don’t know what to tell you. Maybe just have a party instead?”


“It was going to be such a lovely service.”


​“I’m sure it was.”
​

The procedure was quick and painless; and I’m pretty sure she didn’t implant a tracking chip in my neck because my co-pay doesn’t cover that.
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    Author

    Leighann Lord is a veteran stand-up comedian, author, and podcaster. 

    She has written several humor books including: Dict Jokes: Alternate Definitions for Words You’ve Probably Never Heard of But Will Definitely Never Forget and Real Women Do It Standing Up: Stories From the Career of a Very Funny Lady, which has been called “Witty and unexpectedly vulnerable.” Both titles and more are available on Amazon.

    Leighann was the creator of the weekly humor column, The Urban Erma, which was the longest running column in Stage Time Magazine. She has contributed to The Huffington Post and wrote for the pilot of The Chris Rock Show. She is the creator and host of the People with Parents podcast, where she shares personal stories about the role reversal between adult children and their aging parents.
     
    Leighann earned her BA degree in Journalism and Creative Writing from Baruch College, City University of New York, her honorary PhD in Interdisciplinary Studies from Southhampton University, and is a member of the Writer’s Guild of America, East. In 2019 she received the Humanist Arts Award from the American Humanist Association. 
     
    Leighann is also a firm supporter of the Oxford Comma.

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  • HOME
  • ABOUT ME
    • LIFE WITH LEIGHANN
    • STANDUP STORIES
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  • STANDUP VIDEOS
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  • BOOKS ON AMAZON +
    • DICT JOKES
    • REAL WOMEN
  • PODCAST
    • RESOURCES FOR CAREGIVERS
    • ARTICLES OF INTEREST
  • CONTACT & HIRE